Waiting for you
by artemismoon1
Summary: Arthur is immortal and remembers each of his lifetimes. He's waiting for Merlin to return, however when he does he does not remember Arthur, Camelot or even magic. Arthur is faced with the possibility of spending yet another lifetime alone.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Do you ever get that feeling that you have been somewhere before, been someone else before. I have. In fact I have been many places before, been many people before, lived a hundred lifetimes, yet I am still very much the same person that I have always been. This time round, I am James Harper, football superstar. I see the way in which myself and my teammates are fawned over, loved, worshiped even, and I laugh to myself, God how times have changed. Years ago, the kind of treatment I receive now on a daily basis was reserved for royalty. I should know. For the name I am known by now, is a creation of my own imagination, James Harper, if only they all knew who I really am, was. Respected, admired, loved, I was noble, valiant destined for great things. I am, I was Arthur Pendragon, King of Camelot, Uniter of all Albion, and cursed with my immortality. Some days I awake and in the moments before reality sets in I find myself waiting for a dark haired figure, to draw open my curtains, present me with breakfast and try to get me up and out of bed with grin on his face. Merlin. My idiot manservant, court appointed sorcerer, most powerful warlock of all time, but most importantly Merlin, my friend, my lover, the other half to my whole. After those first few moments have passed and the reality in which I now reside once again descends on me, I feel empty, lost and so very much alone. Merlin, darling, idiot, too noble for his own good Merlin, how could you leave me like this. Alone, waiting, when you knew all too well that patience is not one of my virtues. But wait I do. I wait for the day that you will come back to me and we will be together once more, not as master and servant, but equals.

I look at the clock on my nightstand and damn it I am late for training once again, Coach is going to have my balls for this. I stumble out of bed and cross my penthouse heading for the kitchen, and that wonderful little creation known as coffee. As I take my first mouthful I am once again certain that a sorcerer must be responsible for its creation as it truly is magical. Mug in hand I head for the balcony, my eyes taking in the view of London herself. I do love this city, out of all of the places I have resided; London, England will forever be my favourite. I pick up the ever present pack of cigarettes from the table outside, and light myself one, inhaling it deeply, Coach says I should quit, but immortal right, not like I have to be concerned about the big C, nevertheless I am careful not to let him catch me again. As I watch the people of the city slowly come to life, and get ready for the day ahead of them, I crush out my cigarette, drink the remainder of my coffee, exchange a nod with the occupant of the balcony opposite mine, an actor I believe, and head for the shower.

I pull into the parking lot outside the training ground at 08:30am. As I walk in I exchange greetings with Tony the security around here. Not exactly Knight material, 40 if he's a day, a little over weight (too many donuts as he puts it) but a good man, who promptly informs me that Coach is not merely after my balls, but also my dick, great, just what I need. Disappearing into the locker room I change and head out to the pitch. Coach sees me approaching and gives me a look that, for a moment make me thankful of my lack of mortality, this is going to be interesting...

"_Harper, you are late for training...again, that's a £1,000 fine" he snaps_

"_Start a tab" I mumble in reply. _

My retort earns me another glare from Coach, and an amused look from his assistant. Rolling my eyes dramatically behind Coach's back I join my teammates on the field, and training begins. Since, my first incarnation, as I call it, as Arthur, I have been used to getting up at the crack of dawn and doing some form of physical training, usually with the Knights of Camelot. This was of course before I had Merlin as a manservant, the amount of times I had woken up to find him not there with my breakfast are too many to count. After getting myself up and dressed, and just about giving up on him, in he would come carrying a tray full of food and muttering apologies, promising never to do it again. Not that I knew it back then but he was only ever that late after he had been out using magic, saving Camelot, saving me. And how did I repay him for that? By making him muck out my stables. I will admit, discovering his magic was purely accidental, and somewhat difficult to deal with, but I knew that he would never use it to hurt anyone; there was never a malicious bone in that boys body. Had Nimeuh not returned hell bent on revenge I do not think I would have known for many more years. His magic, like my immortality, was both a blessing and a curse, though of course, I never cursed him with his magic.

Training over for the day, I head out of the locker room with my teammates, most of who have decided that seeing as we have a game tomorrow against an old enemy, the pub is out of the question, however dinner in a fancy restaurant is most definitely not. They are good men really, loyal to the club and each of its players, but also, a few of them are caught up in their own celebrity status. This dinner is nothing more than a ploy to get back into the papers before tomorrow's game, I mean what paparazzi is going to abstain from picturing all of the team out together in one of London's most swanky restaurants. Like my life as Arthur I know certain things must be suffered for the good of propriety, and going out like this is one of them, though thankfully there is a mutual agreement that the wives and girlfriends need not be present tonight. I give a small sigh of relief at this, not that I don't get on with their respective other halves, but because this means I do not have to listen to them all trying to get me to date so and so's friend. It's times like then, when I hate my single status, though to come out with the truth, that I just do not find women sexually attractive, well lets just say that it's something I would rather avoid to this lot. Of course there are those who do know of my sexual preferences, only two of those being teammates and they do offer assistance when conversations over my lack of love live arise, I'm not ready for the whole world to know yet, at least not until I find the one, not until I have Merlin back with me.

Back at the penthouse I dress myself in one of my Armani suits, going for stylish yet smart, once pleased that I am at least camera presentable I head to the restaurant. I arrive well before the agreed time of 19:30pm and see several photographers already there; I guess that one of the players provided them with an anonymous tip off. Typical. As I pull up the valet takes my keys and I slip him a £20 note, which is met with his gracious nod, honestly grateful. I always tip, valets, bellboys, waiters you name them I tip them, not out of the arrogant knowledge that I can afford to, but because over the years I have had every job imaginable, and I know what tips mean to people, hell sometimes it makes up the majority of their income. I turn and give the paps what they want, a smile, a nod they take their snaps, they're happy. One of them calls out about the upcoming game, and I give him my standard response. Of course I'm confident we will win and then I'm inside.

With thirty minutes to spare I take a seat at the bar, ignoring the excited whispers and looky loo eyes. The barman comes over and soon a glass of bottled water and lime is sat in front of me I generously tip him and he takes the unspoken request to leave me to it. As I sit here being gawped at I remember Camelot and how as Crown Prince I was forced to sit through political dinners at my father's side, now I sit through dinners which are a publicity stunt, funny how things haven't changed that much. Soon enough I am joined by Jerry Lewis and Gareth (aka Gary) Jones, the only two team members I truly like and get on with, no surprise that these are the two who know of my interest in other men. As they order their also non alcoholic drinks I am once again reminded of why we get along so well, as if we have know each other for years, for you see we have done this before, many years ago. Jerry and Gary are none other than Lancelot and Gawain, two of my best Knights and closest friends, they of course know nothing of this, and put our easy friendship down to the fact that we have so much in common. Well Jerry did, Gary, when convinced it wasn't because I fancied him.

"_You get snapped by the paps then James?"_ asked Gary

_"Of course he did, our little Golden Boy can't go anywhere without being photographed"_ came Jerry's reply

"_Shove off, the pair of you"_ I grumble good-naturedly back at them

"_Awwww come on James you know they love you, you are a decent enough player, not ugly to look at, and you let them have their photos. Unlike other's I could mention"_ said Jerry throwing Gary a very pointed look.

"_What? Just because I am a 'famous' footballer does not mean I have to like having my face in paper after paper, magazine after magazine"_ snapped Gary complete with air quotes on the word famous.

I let them resume their argument about the press and the notion of footballers being celebrities, an argument which has been going on since they both joined the big leagues, roughly 4 years ago. Neither of them regard themselves as celebrities, much like myself, but whereas Jerry sees the media as a necessary evil to deal with, Gary would much rather, and frequently does tells them all to Fuck off and leave him alone, ironically making them take a bigger interest in him. They don't get very far for we are soon joined by the rest of the team, and being directed to our, very large table.

Once seated the maitre d' began his ass kissing, most of the players enjoyed this part of the whole going out to dinner thing, me I sat there trying to ignore the urge to laugh at the whole scene in front of me, not helped at all by the faces Jerry and Gary were currently pulling. After deciding he had done enough bootlicking, he called forth several waiters and thankfully left us to our dinner. Once everyone had ordered an obscene amount of food, and a single glass of wine each, small scatterings of conversation broke out. How did we rate our chances tomorrow? Anyone see David Hayes fight last night? If you had to who would you rather Cameron Diaz or Jessica Biel? Normal topics really. The food arrived and finally the idle chit chat died down. Glancing around the restaurant, I noted a few couples, a couple of cabinet ministers, a small gathering of female soap stars celebrating a birthday, and the paps still outside, waiting for us to leave. The food was as you would expect unfaultable, the service impeccable. However just as desert was to be served I noticed two of the more burley waiters and the maitre d' ushering someone out of the front door. I thought nothing of it until I caught sight of an unruly mop of black hair, and my stomach clenched. Without excusing myself I left the table and followed the maitre d'. Outside I saw as the waiters unceremoniously dumped whoever they were 'escorting' on the pavement. As they returned inside, blue, blue eyes looked up at me from the gutter, eyes I would recognise anywhere. Merlin...


	2. Chapter 2

**Ok because I forgot to mention it earlier, I do not own Merlin, the BBC do; though just to point out if I did...It would be bromance all the way.**

_Also I know I said I would update ages ago but getting the chance at the moment has been a nightmare, that and the current storm has knocked the wifi out. It has just been fixed so you guys are getting it posted straight away._

Chapter 2

Merlin...My God it's really him, right down to the neck scarf. I allow my eyes to drink in the image of him. Still undeniably skinny, with those big blue eyes and sharp cheekbones. His unruly mop of black hair sticking up every which way possible, topped off with those ridiculous ears that he will never grow into. Merlin looks up at me sceptically, and only then do I realise that I have been staring at him in a very undignified fashion. Trying my best to rein in my gaping fish expression I meet his eyes.

"_You know, the polite thing to do in a situation such as this would be to offer me a hand out of the gutter"_ Merlin said, voice annoyed yet slightly amused at the same time.

Rolling my eyes I extend a hand towards him, which after a moment's hesitation he takes, and I haul him onto his feet. Only when he is stood, do I notice what he is wearing. A white shirt bearing the name of the restaurant, which is currently holding my forgotten teammates and tiramisu, the shirt is half covered in some bright orange sauce, and grime from the pavement. He is as tall as I remember, and looks no older than he did the first time we met in Camelot those many years ago.

_ "Thanks"_ he mumbles causing me to stop staring at him

_"Don't mention it"_

Merlin cocks his head to the side and studies me for a moment. I stand there feeling like a recruit in front of his commander for the first time, knowing that if I don't pass this inspection I'm in deep shit. After what feels like forever his gaze drops and he's digging into his trouser pocket. Pulling out a slightly squashed pack of Marlboro he pops one in his mouth and digs around for a lighter. Without thinking I extend a hand holding an already lit Zippo. Once he has had his first drag he looks at me again with an amused smirk.

_"Didn't think you football lot partake in such an unhealthy habit"_

_ "Yes, well let's just keep this between ourselves_" I replied lighting my own cigarette. _"Any reason you where thrown out?"_

"_Oh that...that was them letting me know my services will no longer be required"_

"_So much for a pink slip"_

I focus my eyes on him, how easy it is to fall into old patterns, only to find him looking at me with curiosity in his eyes.

_ "So what possible reason could James Harper have for standing in the gutter talking to a former kitchen boy, instead of being inside enjoying his highly overpriced meal?"_

My face must have shown my surprise.

_"You know who I am?" I ask_

_ "James Harper, pro footballer, secret cigarette smoker...yeah, you sound surprised. It's not only you athletic types who enjoy the beautiful game"_

Then it hits me, Merlin, my Merlin has no idea of who I really am, only who I pretend to be. Damn, so much for falling back into things. Destiny sure has a funny sense of humour. To find him after all these years only to discover he doesn't even recognise me. I watch as he crushes out his cigarette.

"_Well thanks for the hand...and the light. Now if you will excuse me I have a few choice words for my former boss" _

On that note he marches straight back into the restaurant and through to the kitchen not even bothering to spare a glance at the burly waiters who threw him out once before. I watched slightly dumbfounded, at exaggerated arm gestures and disapproving looks before chipping out my cigarette and heading back inside the door. There is a lot of noise coming from the general direction of the kitchen, although I cannot make out any of the words being spoken. Just as I'm about to head in there and see what's going on for myself, Merlin comes back through the swinging door, backpack in hand. He looks at me momentarily, before dramatically rolling his eyes a slight grin forming on his face.

_"That went better than I thought it would"_ he murmured

Merlin shook his head slightly as if clearing it of something.

"_Well, enjoy the remainder of your meal Mr Harper...and good luck with the game tomorrow" he said "now if you will excuse me, I have a bus to catch"_

He made to leave through the door and I heard myself speak

_"Where abouts do you live?"_

He turned to regard me momentarily before answering

_"About 20 minutes south of here, why?"_

_ "I'm done here, and I live that way on...I could give you a lift if you would like?"_

I waited with baited breath, what possible reason could he have for accepting my offer, we had spent less than a few minutes together, and shared cigarette in the street, he didn't know me from Adam, yet still I found myself praying to any deity that would listen...Please let him say yes.

_"Alright, a lift would be great"_

I'm sure I actually stopped breathing for a moment...He's said yes. Realising I was once again staring at him I broke eye contact and nodded once.

_"Right, er...let me just settle my bill and we'll be off"_

After excusing myself from dinner, and ignoring the pointed looks I was getting from Jerry and Gary, I threw a couple of £50's on the table and headed out the front with Merlin to collect my car from the valet.

Oh my God, I found him, I actually did it. Ok Arthur calm down, try not to freak him out, it's just a lift home, no big deal...do not come across as a sexual predator, god I hope I haven't got my 'hunt' face on. He's giving me awkward looks wha...Oh duh the car is here. We climb in, and I notice the impressed but trying not to show it look on Merlin's face, then he turns to face me.

_"I'm Ash by the way"_

I nod at this and then before I can stop myself I ask him the one thing that had been nagging at me.

_"Ash...why did you agree to the lift home?" _

**OK guys lemme know what ya think**

**Remember reviews are love**

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry it has taken me so long to update things just somehow seem to keep getting in the way, back to school on Monday so knew I had to get this up today. Officially making a promise to update regularly at least once a week if not more all depends if inspiration stays with me...fingers crossed that it will xxxx**

**Also I have big plans for Morgana in the upcoming chapters so stay tuned**

Chapter 3

I look over at Merlin waiting for an answer an answer which he seems to have though is internally debating with himself whether or not to share it with me. I focus on driving the car away from the restaurant and head south...the complete opposite direction to where I live. As the car moves along I gradually begin to give up on him ever giving me an answer. I look over at him to see him staring back studying my face a puzzled look marring his features, and uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach.

_"You know, you're a lot different than I thought you would be" _he says suddenly

_"How so?"_

"_I had you stereotyped I guess. I mean I figured you being a famous footballer and all that socially to us regular people you would be a bit of a prat...I was wrong"_

_ "Well thanks"_

I had to smile to myself. Why was it after all this time his favourite thing to call me is at the forefront of his mind?

"_You're welcome. You know I figured all of you would be the same, I mean I have worked in other restaurants where celebs hang out and they are under the impression that they can get whatever they want, treat everyone like their servants and act as if they own the place. Hell even some of your teammates act as if they are owed something for being able to kick a ball across a field, let's just say when I actually spoke to you I was pleasantly surprised, it's good to know that even though you are socially above most of us it hasn't gone to your head"._

Finished Merlin turned to look at me as if waiting for me to do and or say something that would let him know that I was what he thought I was, a self centred celeb with an inflated sense of my own importance. I looked over at him and gave him my best disarming smile...the charm smile he used to call it, and perhaps the only real weapon I could use against him, he was after all, the most powerful being to have ever graced this world, even if he could not yet remember this, but he would remember, of this I was certain.

"_I'm not socially above anyone. Sure I'm paid to do what I love, and lucky to be in the position I'm in, but at the end of the day I'm really no different from you...except maybe that I'm not covered in soup."_ I reply

Merlin just smirks at me.

_ "You are just jealous, because this is a look only someone like me can pull off"_

_ "Someone like you?"_

_ "Social outcast...you know, different, not what you would perceive as normal"._

_ "You have met my teammate's right...trust me I'm used to the whole not normal thing"_

"_OK that is so not fair, talent, looks and a sense of humour...some people just have all the luck"_ he said sarcastically

OMG OMG...calm down Arthur yes he just said you are a looker but seriously baby steps here do not frighten him away...

_"Each of us have our crosses to bear I guess"_ I replied equally sarcastic

"_yeah well anytime you fancy a trade off just let me know...on second thoughts having to run around in shorts in the snow...I think I would rather watch the game then than play it. Oh it's a left up here by the way"_

Dutifully I turn left on to a modest little road. Typical Merlin, you always did prefer little places that have a lot of character. The houses down this road where all different colours. Granted this was definitely the poorer part of the city, though somehow seeing it now I felt as if I had been cheated, this was a road I could live down, a homely road, not a sterile apartment like the one I currently resided in.

_"It's not much to look at...but its home"_ he says as we pull up infront of a pale blue house.

_"Ash believe when I say, it's a lot better looking, and much more inviting than my home"_

"_Yes well, when you choose to live in a skyscraper what do you expect...yes I know you don't live anywhere near here, infact it's going to take you almost an hour to get home from here so long as the traffic isn't too bad"_

I just look dumbfounded at him...Shit, now I officially come across as the creepy stalker/serial killer/freak...

"_So as to answer your earlier question why did I accept the ride home? You looked like you wanted outta there all most as much as I did, and I guess my charitable nature took pity on you"_ he casually remarked.

"_That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard, have you no sense of self preservation at all? What if I had been a nut job huh I could have driven off with you and killed you...did nobody ever teach you not to get into cars with strangers"_

Fuck...Why did I say that now he's really going to freak out...wait he...that little shit he's laughing at me, he...

_ "God you sound just like my mother..."_

Despite my anger at his stupidity I couldn't help but laugh too. His laughter has always been infectious, the richness of it, the way it brings his eyes to life. God I could so easily just lean over and kiss him right now, take him here in the front of the car regardless of who could see us...Merlin, he would be proud of my self control, should be proud of the fact I have some now, happy at the fact that unlike before we wouldn't be caught as I ravaged him in the armoury, stables hell even on the throne that one time...I have to get him back.

_"Thank you"_ I say suddenly catching his eye

_"For what?"_ he asks questioningly

"_I did need to get out of that place, and believe it or not Ash, I have actually enjoyed your company...you treat me like a real person, and are not put off of saying exactly what you think just because of who I am, and you have no idea how refreshing that is"._

"_Well then, glad to be of service...look why don't you come and have a coffee before you go, I won't take no for an answer, call it a thank you for the lift, and the hand up earlier"_

Okay coffee...just coffee Arthur nothing else, you don't even know if he likes men in that way in this life he may like women...what if he does? What if he has a girlfriend? Stop it if he does he does, nothing you can do about it now. I hope he remembers who he is soon this arguing with myself cannot be good for my sanity. Shit he's waiting for an answer.

_"Alright, thank you I will"_

We get out of the car and head up to the front door, just as he's about to put the key in the lock the door opens from the inside and standing there with a smirk adorning her face is the last person I expected to see tonight...Morgana.

**Okay I know it was a lot of dialogue in this one but I promise there will be more of a back story in the next couple of chapters x**

**Reviews are love my lovelies xxxx**


	4. Chapter 4

**OMG I cannot believe how long it has been since I last updated this story...so much has happened and I have been honoured with meeting so many people who unknowingly have helped inspire me to start writing again, have given me direction in life and in turn with the writing of this story...I thank you all**

**xxxxx**

Chapter 4

Morgana...what the fuck is that psychotic bitch doing here I swear to any deity out there I will kill her, I

"_Ash your home early...Oh and you have company"_ said Morgana

"_Hi Jessie, yeah, early...no I don't wanna talk about it before you ask, no I will not be going back and yeah this is James, he...he gave me a ride home"_

Morgana...Jessie's eyebrow quirks at this

"_I'll bet he did..."_

I physically feel my jaw hit the floor at this and when I chance a glance at Ash I see his ears burning furiously just like Merlin's used to whenever he got embarrassed.

"_Jessie..." _

I note the warning tone in Ash's voice

"_You know I'm only playing...anyways Sarah called her babysitter has let her down something about flu...more likely there's a party happening somewhere, I swear that girl is so unreliable I don't know why Sarah keeps her around. So my girls night out is cancelled, looks like it's going to be a night in instead"_

"_You're not going out now?"_

"_Relax Ash...obviously now that you have a 'friend', to keep you company tonight I'm going to pick up a bottle and head over to Sarah's and we can have a non-night-out with Chinese food. Oh before I forget, your mother called, she said she expects you home on Sunday for lunch and to tell you not to forget Uncle Andrew's gift...right I'm out of here. Call me in the morning and we'll...catch up. James lovely to have met you perhaps next time we will get a chance to talk"_

I shifted to the side to let Morgana pass and watched as she climbed inside her Mercedes before speeding off down the road. I turned slightly to look at Ash who gave me a sheepish grin before indicating I should head inside.

Walking through the front door was more of a mission than it should've been...what with the bike, numerous pairs of shoes, boxes and what looked to be the entire contents of an art supply store. Following Ash's directions I headed into the second door on the left and found myself in the front room. Catching sight of it I can't suppress the grin forming its way on to my face...every piece of furniture in here is mismatched.

"_Sorry about the mess...it's..."_ Ash said

"_Mess...nah, this isn't mess, this is lived in"_

Ash raises an eyebrow at me

"_Lived in?"_

"_Yeah you know, has actual inhabitants from time to time...my place is so sterile it makes a hospital look dirty"_

I shoot him my charm smile just for good measure...don't want him thinking that I'm only saying this to be polite.

"_I take it you have a maid then?"_

I merely throw him a confused glance...how on earth could he know that

"_I saw the empty Maccy D's wrappers in back of your car...take it she doesn't clean that out for you"_

He was more observant than I thought...I really need to remember to take those out at some point

"_If only she would"_

He rolls his eyes at me before moving a heap of paper off of the armchair and indicates for me to sit down.

"_Are you an artist?"_ I ask noting the numerous drawings on the table

"_Me god no...I have no artistic talent in any way shape or form, Jessie is the artist much to her parents disapproval"_

Parents? How can Morgana have parents we share a father...because in this life she is not Morgana Arthur she is Jessie, an artist who has parents. This whole reincarnation malarkey does tend to play havoc with the way in which people can look at things...I didn't see any sign of recognition in Morgana's eyes when she saw me, maybe she like Merlin doesn't remember her past life as an evil, traitorous, murdering witch...if this is the case I seriously need to control my hostility towards Morgana...I mean it's not Jessie's fault that she just happens to look exactly like her.

"_Yeah her father is some hot shot lawyer and her mother a socialite who constantly seems to throw dinner parties...Jessie wants nothing to do with either lifestyle, not exactly on the best of terms last time I heard with her father, he threatened to financially cut her off unless she moved back to Cambridge before the month was out...she's not worried though...well unless she has to sell her car, then I can foresee her being hell to live with"_

"_You two live together?"_

Oh gods Merlin and Morgana...I think I'm going to be sick. Merlin with the person who killed him...

"_Yes...I needed a housemate, there was no way I would've been able to afford to rent this place on my own...and Jessie is great to live with, if you can get over her habit of leaving things everywhere"_

"_How long have you two been together then?"_

I can't believe I just asked him that OMG...

"_Um...Jessie and I are not a couple...I...if I were to ever be with a woman again Jessie would be perfect you know she gets me on a level that no one else has ever done before in my life, I truly believe that my life would not be the same without her in it"_

I glance over at him to see him sheepishly looking back at me

"_Oh...just I thought that you two...I mean you two seem"_

"_No we are very much just best friends"_

"_I'm sorry for prying, I mean...I just met you and already I seem to be asking completely inappropriate questions"_

Merlin gives me a bemused half smile the kind that could melt my heart yet also leave me slightly concerned about what would come out of his mouth next.

"_James...please don't apologise, and you weren't prying not really, I...I tend to open my mouth far more than necessary at times, and you, I don't know, there's something about you...I, you I find as easy to talk to as people I have know my entire life"_

Merlin you have known me longer than the entire time most of these people have been alive...I only wish you could remember me, yourself...who we both really are. I guess with Morgana as your best friend and I can hardly believe I am even thinking this, if I want you back I'm going to have to play nice as long as she does...I wish you were here Merlin, really here with me, you would always know what to do in situations such as these. I am going to get you back though, one way or another I just hope I don't find some monumental way of fucking it up somehow. As for Morgana...as long as it's Jessie, as long as Morgana doesn't somehow come back, I guess I can get to know Jessie. I'm not saying it's going to be easy getting over the fact that she is Morgana's double but in this life of yours she is obviously very important to you and I will not be responsible for causing you pain, not again.

"_Why don't I go make that coffee?" _

Your voice pulls me from my thoughts and I notice that most of the artwork is now neatly piled on one of the other chairs in the room. I take a moment to look at you, exactly how you looked when we first met, with the kindest of hearts, one that could have only ever been matched against Gwen's. My Merlin...with a heart as big as the world and happiness in your eyes that I have longed to look upon for far too long. Yes I will get you back Merlin, back at my side where you belong where your love and compassion for those around you can heal my lonely old heart and make me whole once more.

"_Coffee would be great" _

**Reviews are love**

**xxxxxxxxxxxxx**


End file.
